Does money ever just feel like it’s burning a hole in your pocket? If I’m being honest, that’s a big reason why I don’t carry cash. It’s too easy and too tempting to spend.
But even when I’m budgeting, tracking my expenses, and tucking paper bills out of sight and out of mind, I still get the urge to shop from time to time.
The last time this impulse struck, it was because my baby was starting part-time daycare. Even the three blind mice could spot the emotional trigger behind that desire to spend.
But sometimes it hits out of the blue, and this weekend was one of those weekends. Thankfully, I got myself in line. But it was stacking up to be quite the spend-fest otherwise.
Here’s everything I tried to buy…and what I actually purchased.
Everything I Tried to Buy My Toddler This Weekend
Presented without commentary (yet), here’s everything that landed in my carts–virtual and real-life–this weekend.
| Toy Road Roller | Goodwill | $9.99 (it was also covered in mud and maybe broken?) |
| Toy Crane | Goodwill | $2.99 |
| Toy Dump Trucks | Goodwill | $0.50 each |
| Bowling Pin set in case | Goodwill | $2.99 |
| Mega Blocks set in case | Goodwill | missing price sticker |
| Assorted 2T toddler long-sleeve shirts & pants | Kohls | $93.47 (without 20% off coupon code) |
| 2T 4-piece pajama set | Target | $14.97 |
| Snowsuit | Kohls | $40.00 (unless I did BOGO 50% off) |
| Potty chair | IKEA | $12.99 |
| LILLABO train turntable | IKEA | $3.99 |
| LILLABO 20-piece basic train set | IKEA | $9.99 |
| LILLABO toy crane | IKEA | $2.99 |
| Toggle coat | Carter’s | $37.20 |
| 2T 4-piece pajama set | Carter’s | $16.99 (A doorbuster!) |
| Windbreaker | Carter’s | $12.00 |
| Gray sneakers | Carter’s | $21 |
| 2-pack mittens | Carter’s | $6 |
| Insulated snow bibs | Carter’s | $45 |
| Peppa Pig George Dino-Raur Hoodie | Amazon | $20 |
| Peppa Pig Color Wonder coloring sheets | Amazon | $7 |
Grand Total – $249.56 plus taxes
Looking back at this list, I see a few things he legitimately needs. But mostly, I see that I clearly fall for 1.) email marketing, 2.) “Customers Also Bought” buttons, and 3.) just about everything else.
What I Actually Bought Him
Friday
Trucks & Bowling Pin Set – $4.33
After spending the afternoon playing down the block with the neighbors, HP really wanted some trucks. Specifically, he wanted more trucks for his box of pea gravel that we keep in the basement. Unlike our neighbors’ set up, his construction site is accessible 24/7 rain or shine. We found two dump trucks at Goodwill for $1 total. Plus, I scooped up a bowling pin set for $3. I’m putting that away for him for Christmas.
7 Pieces of Toddler Clothing – $0.55*
The clothing total actually clocked in at just over $32, but I still had a merchandise credit from a bunch of Christmas returns that HP didn’t need at the time. That means that put less than a dollar on my Kohl’s charge. I also got $3 cashback with Ebates, so it worked out pretty well. I’m mostly missing our hand-me-downs though.
RELATED POST: Should I Feel Guilty for Accepting Hand-Me-Downs?
Saturday
Kid’s Meal – $3.49 plus tax
We don’t eat out all that often, but we were out and about, and it’s kind of a commitment to be out where we were running errands. Plus, I was stalling on grocery shopping. Dinner at IKEA it was! Truthfully, HP likes their green beans as much as their fries. This is money well spent!
Wooden Crane & Train – $2.99 plus tax
Earlier this year, we got a hand-me-down wooden train set. It was over 10 years old, and it definitely needs a few pieces. We’ve already bought a few of the straight wood pieces to make the track a bit bigger. Then I discovered that IKEA put the crane and train on clearance (from $7.99), so I was happy to buy it for him. Our wooden train set is now complete.
Sunday
Yogurt Pouch – $0.79 plus tax
As a parent, I am a professional Snack Handler. My backpack runneth over with snacks, and I can usually count on my husband to fill up his pockets as well. Still, HP loves to add things to the grocery cart, and he’s very skilled at finding the baby and toddler food pouches. It’s less than a dollar, and it’s the only thing he ever asks for at the store. Sold.
Weekend Total – $12.15
We earmark $100 a month on spending for each of us. Sometimes, that looks like a whole bunch of diapers and other times it’s tuition for a park district class. Then, there are months where it seems like it’s mostly just treats. This month will likely be a mix of both. There’s a play center we’d like to check out with him, and I really do think we have to spring for a pair of shoes and maybe snow pants.
The Balancing Act of Spending
So much of money is a gray area. The line between needs and wants is never as firm as money experts make it seem. I am finding that being a mom only complicates things further.
Babies and toddlers (like their grown counterparts) have very few actual needs. But I’m not interested in raising a Future Stoic, as much as I think my toddler really does teach me about minimalism. That means that I’m OK with welcoming some comforts into our lives. But I’m constantly shocked at how quickly I allow one need or one want to turn into dozens.
We needed a few pieces of clothing; I tried to buy the entire toddler section.
HP wanted a truck; I let him litter the floor with options at Goodwill.
It’s really easy as a parent to say that kids are expensive. There’s also quite a bit of truth to it (I’m looking at you, diapers and daycare). But a lot of what would amount to a massive expense isn’t actually a need or a want of my son’s. It’s a want of my own.
I want to buy him things. Things he doesn’t need or want. As odd as this sounds, I suspect I am far from the only parent who feels this way.
Left unchecked, I could very easy spend far too much on my child. That’s why it’s necessary for me to reflect–I want to keep my cash and have less clutter, thankyouverymuch. Plus, that 529 isn’t going to fill itself.
So Tell Me…Did you reign in any purchasing decisions this weekend?
Last weekend, I was at Once Upon a Child with all 3 kids to buy snow gear (and Rob was working). I almost bought Halloween costumes (our kids are already set), cute clothes that my oldest will never wear, and hair bows that our middle loves but doesn’t actually wear. On top of that, I actually bought both of my older kids a toy and we ended up at McDonald’s (good news- we also bought the snow gear).
With kids, its tough to align spending and values, because the joy (even the temporary joy) is so contagious when you buy a toy (even a $1 toy from Goodwill). I prefer to spend time (and money and physical space) on memory building activities that the whole family can enjoy. Having friends over to actually play with the toys we have, spending time outside actually using our outdoors gear, visiting orchards, camping or visiting cabins. But at the end of the day, if I’m shopping with kids, I’m going to spend money on stupid things, and that’s just how it is for us. I prefer to see my kids briefly happy than to be the No Mom all the time.
BOGO offers on things like snowpants are SO ANNOYING. Like, really, how many times will you need two pairs of snowpants?
Socks, pants, shirts…ok. Snowpants seem ridiculous, though.
Kohl’s is classic for this kind of sale and it drives me nuts!
I adore IKEA, and I love that their toys are both cool and inexpensive.
I think the potty seat is adorable. I don’t even have kids.
I try to hit an IKEA in early November to get toys for the Toys for Tots drive they have at work, since my $ will do more and go further.
As with many of your posts, this one really spoke to me. I’m perhaps a little more disciplined than many parents due to my natural cheapskate tendencies and anxiety over the amount of stuff in our house, but in spite of those things I am constantly keeping myself in check and, honestly, I don’t always succeed. It absolutely is a grey area. Not everything is a need in the strictest sense, but young minds grow so much in the first 5 years and I want to make sure I’m providing what he needs to develop. That doesn’t always mean spending money and buying stuff, but sometimes it does.
Right on, Sarah! I feel like that about books. It’s the one thing I really have a hard time saying no to. But now I’m starting to feel that way about puzzles and so many other manipulatives! Thankfully, our library systems are great, and we can check lots of things out. Which means cost savings and NO CLUTTER (at least not permanently!).
This weekend was splurgey! We found a family-friendly bookstore and I let JB pick one book from the new shelf for zir birthday (MONTHS away still) and two books from the used bookshelf for a total of $10, plus I let zir best friend pick a new book for zir upcoming birthday too, AND bought / ordered 4 books for birthday gifts. Because A) I am a sucker for books and B) I wanted to support the local bookstore. MOSTLY A though, B was mostly just an excuse. It was $20 to start with 3 more books to pay for when those orders come in.
I remind myself that we scrimp elsewhere so we can pay a little more at local places.
I feel this way about my godson! I was travelling recently, and I almost bought him a puppet, multiple books, stickers, and an assortment of clothes. I stopped myself though because he’s only one and won’t remember any of these things. He also has tons of stuff and absolutely does not need anything.
Target and Kohl’s are the two places TwC views as his toy heaven. Once he gets into the toy section of both stores he refuses to leave unless we buy him something. Sometimes we get away with it by avoiding that section all together whenever we’re at the store but other times we give in at get him something really small and cheap so he won’t whine and cry. Crazy I tell you!!